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So the jumbo sausage that uncle bought for the movie yesterday, apparently according to that fucking brat, I said I wanted to eat it. Then I did, this morning WHICH SHE DOESN’T FUCKING KNOW CUS SHE WAS FUCKING SLEEPING AWAY HER FUCKED UP ASS. So anyways, she just accused me of saying I want to eat it but not eating. And in her words “don’t say you want to eat then you don’t eat.” HEY YOU FUCK ASS. IF YOU WANT ME TO GET FAT WHY NOT JUST SAY IT DIRECTLY. DON’T FUCKING BEAT AROUND THE BUSH. AND ANYHOW ACCUSE ME WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW ANY FUCKING FACTS AND IS SO DAMN NARROW MINDED. So what really bothers me is how I’m just sitting here in the kitchen fucking attempting to study cus my critical SA2 is coming and y’all wasted 2 hrs of my time getting me to go down to the bank to sign the shit joint account during this period at this time. Why isit that when I need things to be done, when something is important to me (my plans) y’all NEVER FAIL to destroy and ruin them? Is that what y’all are? Exist to wreck my life and how perfect it could’ve been? Yes so anyways back to how I am actually so rarely attempting to study and focus, then I overhear (no I wasn’t eavesdropping let me get to how fucking loud that brat is talking later on) the brat complaining to aunty on how I say I want to eat then I don’t blah blah blah. Then aunty said nevermind mummy can eat for me tmr. Then omg that fucking brat almost screamed out, “BUT SHE SAY SHE WANT EAT WHAT!” hey its pretty clear from your tone, and the underlying tone, that YOU FUCKING WANT ME TO EAT AND GET FAT. you brat! In the first place its not that I don’t want eat. Actually I wanted, now you just make me SO GOD DAMN MAD THAT I FEEL LIKE FUCKIING SMASHING THE SAUSAGE AND FUCKING SLAPPING IT ON YOUR FUCKING DIRTFACE. Seriously she has no respect, no manners, don’t even fucking bother to try regarding me with some worth, and just goddamn selfish and must have things her way. Simply put, any adjective used to describe the worst being, it fits perfectly for her. Oh yes and, she did mention when she first interrogated me if I had eaten the sausage, that when uncle and her saw the sausage (according to her it was still the whole thing, and may I mention she screamed this AGAIN, and also, I REPEAT AGAIN THAT I ATE 1/3 OF THE DAMN SAUSAGE IN THE MORNING BUT SHE FUCKING IGNORANT BRAT) he shook his head. LIKE EVEN UNCLE!? I thought it was purely just the brat being immature and everything, but I guess if uncle as well… then it must mean either they are all `fucking narrow minded and childish and immature and fail to see the more important things in life, or they just love to pick at me whenever possible. Either way, it made me realise my self-worth-lessness. Yup. To them, I’m not invisible obviously, I’m just not worthy enough to be treated fairly, with respect, with privacy, at least with the most minimum amount of regard. That’s just it, nothing more nothing less.

Oh and she just fucking slapped the fridge door right beside me. SERIOUSLY FUCKING FOR WHAT. NO RESPECT. See, this just proves how much worth I am of in this house, I’m fucking older and she has NEVER TREATED ME AS OLDER. WOW JUST WOW. AND HER PARENTS? ALL THE TALK ABOUT RESPECT AND SIBLING LOVE WHAT NONSENSE. I think they really need to learn not to empty talk or it’ll just come out as a pile of thrash.
Oh yes and it’s not that I wanna self pity and all, but while they were in the room watching the show with the ice Adonis girl in it, then aunty said something about that girl who is bad because she “keeps lying” then the brat said but got ppl (guys) like her in the show right? The answer is yes. Just thinking bout this kinda makes my heart ache. Just like her, I’m known in this house as one who “keeps lying”, but think about it, I actually don’t have anyone who likes me. So unlike her, who often in the show cries about losing the people she love if they found out on her past crimes and all, for me, I don’t actually have someone to cry over other than for people I can never have. And I wouldn’t have people crying for me. Other than those who are merely shedding for the sake of the occasion should something untoward ever happens to me. For God, hopefully he’ll just embrace me with welcoming arms.

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